Marriage is a journey

A man and a woman take their marriage vows, witness by family members, relatives and friends. And they become husband and wife. As a tradition, some may go for their honeymoon right away. There they will spend all their romantic time together, strolling along the beach or staying in their hotel room, only the two of them. They only have eyes for each other and it seems for a moment, they are the only two person existed in the world, just like Adam and Eve. When the honeymoon is over, they are back to their normal life. Only this time, they are starting their life as husband and wife. They start to plan for their future. They want to buy a house or a car or even starting a family. Then the baby comes. They become new parents, a mother and a father for their child. This is such a huge responsibility. Can they handle it? Of course, although a new experience for them, they can get some help from their families and friends. A new family has been created. Not all are lucky to be able to have their own child. But there are options. They can adopt or find a surrogate mother to carry their child. Now priority is no longer only for the two of them anymore. They have a little helpless human being that needs their care to grow and become another adult. Their attention is now on their child/children. From nursing them, giving them the lessons of basic value of every human being and to give them a good education. All these have mature them to become better parents. As their children grow into adulthood, they see themselves growing old. Soon, their children will leave them and embark to a new life, single or married. So, the journey of marriage began.

How and why we feel crazy around Money

How and why we get this way is a complex issue. It could be that we feel very powerful if we had so much money or perhaps money can get what we want. I doubt that any one of us chooses, at least consciously to abuse money. It’s not a decision we make, like going to graduate school, or having a baby, or buying new house, or even buying a new wardrobe. That’s why it’s so insidious and so baffling to most of us. And that’s why we want and need to change it. Money is power. Anyone would be crazy if they said they didn’t need money in their life. It is a sad fact that some people who are in desperation, would do crazy and stupid thing like robbing a bank, or borrowing money buying things that obviously not in their budget or don’t need/want it. The danger in wanting to change our behavior, however, is being impatient and naïve about the process. I think it’s important to recognize the fact that we didn’t get this way overnight, and we won’t get out of it overnight. The highway to health, like any highway, has restaurants and markets, shopping malls and car dealerships. We cannot stoop using money in the same way a recovering alcoholic can stop drinking or an addict can stop using drugs. We must spend money, even as we stop abusing it. But we can pay attention to how we get into debt so we can gain some understanding of why. It usually with the little thing.